This Tangled Heart Of Mine

People start blogs for all sorts of reasons.  Some bloggers are incredibly talented cooks, crafters, story-makers, and they want to share their gifts with the world, and the world wants to enjoy those gifts!  Some bloggers have a knack for being in the know, and that is certainly a gift that is in high demand.  Some have twenty cats, and take lots of pictures, and we eat that shit up.

But who starts a blog to bear their soul to a world of strangers?  Who would be crazy enough to share their deepest, darkest secrets, those details of their life that they cringe at just thinking about, with any and everyone who feels like reading about them?  What kind of person would CHOOSE to become completely vulnerable on a level that has only ever proved to be extremely painful and difficult, and for what purpose?

Hi, I’m Jennifer.  I’ve suffered quite a bit, and I’ve caused quite a bit of suffering.  I’ve been a victim of terrible choices, and I’ve made choices that have had terrible affects on others.  I’ve experienced some really terrific moments, and I’ve been fortunate to know some really terrific people.  I have a lot to heal from, and a lot to mend.  And I don’t think I’m alone in any of this.  In fact, I KNOW that my story is as common as it is unique.

So here’s what I hope:  I hope that someone in who-knows-where, Kansas reads this blog one day and she feels a little less alone in her journey.  I hope that he reads one of my posts and chooses to make one better choice for himself that day.  I hope my words convince her that she is SO worth being loved.  And I hope he chooses to love himself a little more than he did before.  I hope that as I seek to untangle this heart of mine that has been buried under thorns for so many years, it will somehow ripple out to others who have their own tangled messes.  And I hope that we can untangle together.


6 thoughts on “This Tangled Heart Of Mine

  1. I can’t wait to read your blog. I already know it will be painful for you and also for me since I played a huge role in the pain you suffered. However, I think it is good for you to do this and you should never worry about what others like me will think or feel as you share things that may be painful for them to read. Why? Because somewhere out there a PERSON, a living breathing person is drowning because they can’t get free from the tangles in their own heart. Maybe, just maybe, your story will help them. That is my prayer, and I believe God answers prayer. I love you baby girl.

    Liked by 1 person

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